I was recently made aware about a parent complaint about one of our lessons. 

The feedback focused on one of our year 8 lessons that covers the topic of masturbation. The Life Lessons team and I felt it important to address that feedback and to share how we have responded as an organisation.

We acknowledge the seriousness of this feedback and want to state clearly: We got it wrong this time. We regret that our material did not meet the standards we set for ourselves and the expectations of the families we serve. 

Before I go into the specifics of this lesson I feel it relevant to describe our purpose and approach as an organisation.

Our vision is to support all young people to make healthy choices and to thrive. We do this by supporting schools to deliver the very best PSHE lessons that put young people at the centre of those lessons; it’s their life and they need to see how it relates to them.

We were founded by myself and Nicole Rodden, a former teacher of PSHE who understands the challenges of teaching this PSHE and making it relatable to young people. 

What is covered in our materials is defined by the government’s statutory requirements for RSHE. Our approach to lesson design is shaped by the growing evidence base of what works with the teaching of this subject, this includes that shared by The PSHE Association. Regarding age appropriateness, what should be taught to who and when, we lean on the evidence from organisations such as the NSPCC with whom we have a partnership. 

This work enables us to provide a comprehensive set of teaching materials for use in schools across the country. 

No one understands their children better than their parents and the school teachers that they see every day.  We can never understand the diverse needs of every classroom and community across the UK. Therefore we create and serve materials that are designed to be localised by schools. Schools teach some of our materials and not others, blending our work with other providers or their own. Schools can and do edit our lessons removing and adding bits. 

Schools have the ultimate say on what should be taught to who and at what age. Everything from Life Lessons is designed to be contextualised.

That said, we are an authority and expert provider for PSHE, our default lessons must be trusted and fit for purpose. This lesson, about which there was a complaint, fell short of the standard we expect with our materials.

It’s for this reason we have withdrawn the lesson from our curriculum.

Why teach masturbation at all and at what age?

Statutory guidance for RSE in England stipulates secondary age young people learn:

  • The main changes which take place in males and females, and the implications for emotional and physical health.
  • The facts about puberty, the changing adolescent body, including brain development.
  • That sex, for people who feel ready and are over the age of consent, can and should be enjoyable and positive. 

The NSPCC’s ‘Sexual development and behaviour in children’ provides further detail:

  • ‘Between the ages of 9-13 children begin to get more curious about sex and relationships. They may start to be attracted to other people. Examples of typical sexual behaviour during this stage include:
    • masturbating in private (National Sexual Violence Resource Centre, 2013; NCTSN, 2009; SECASA, 2017; Stop It Now, 2007; Stop It Now, 2020; Virtual Lab School, 2021).’

This lesson had the following aims: 

  • To teach that masturbation can be a normal part of puberty, when many young people start experiencing sexual feelings and behaviours.
  • To teach that masturbation is private but not shameful
  • To acknowledge that understanding our own bodies helps with consent and decisions around intimate relationships as we grow up.

However we didn’t achieve all of these aims well:

  • The lesson included activities and content that could be interpreted as suggesting that masturbation is not only normal but something to aspire to. This may have unintentionally conveyed that those who do not masturbate are outside the norm.
  • As a result, the content had the potential to make some students feel uncomfortable, and it may also have placed teachers in an equally uncomfortable position while delivering the lesson.

I apologise unequivocally for our error in judgment, and for the discomfort this lesson caused for both parents and teachers. We take full responsibility for the content that was published.

Feedback from schools, parents and young people themselves is essential to shape our work ongoing, we welcome it and will always listen and incorporate that feedback to raise the bar of provision. 

This lesson was due to be retired in the summer term in line with the introduction of our new curriculum. In fact the replacement lesson for this subject and year group has already been created. 

For partner schools we have replaced the old lesson with this one ahead of schedule in our curriculum plan. For non-partner schools or parents that wish to see the new, updated lesson, you can do so here: 

Download the latest Year 8 RSHE Lesson ‘How can people understand their sexual desires?’

Our new curriculum lessons incorporate the updated evidence, supporting a relational approach across to teaching, designed to be inclusive and to better support teachers to be effective facilitators of conversation in the classroom, for example with scaffolding for every discussion. 

How we are ensuring this doesn’t happen again

  1. More conversations with parents

We are moving immediately to conduct a parent focus group from which we may establish a Parent Advisory Board to ensure our curriculum development and review process is consistently informed and in step with the needs of a broad range of parents. We recognise that the feedback we receive is invaluable, indeed, it is essential to the quality of our work. 

We will share an update on this initiative in the coming months. 

  1. We are reviewing our lesson review and sign-off process on materials

We are currently reviewing the sign-off process for all materials. In the meantime, we are checking all other lessons within the RSE section of our curriculum to ensure that all materials meet the highest possible quality standards before our new curriculum launches this summer.

If you have further questions about our work please contact us.